Young People’s Music These Days

WARNING – there are rude words below.

One evening, when my son was much younger than the 6 foot 2 man that he is today, we together entered the local video rental shop.  The loud hip hop music alerted me to the fact that the usual sober manager was not on duty and some teenage girl was commander-in-chief for the night.

Now, I go to great lengths to try and avoid complaining about “Young people’s music these days.”  I do enough stuff that involuntarily makes me act like my father – for instance, moaning when I get up from a chair – that I don’t need to say things like, “In my day you could hear the lyrics,” or “What are those rap singers in such a hurry to say all the time?”  But the music in the video shop was not only loud, it was liberally peppered with profanities and it was quite sexually explicit.

If I had been alone I almost certainly would have just gotten out of there as quickly as I could and not said a word but since my son was dithering over his video choice, I thought it would be nice if he was just a bit older before he learned how to, “Smack his bitch around.”  So I walked up to the gum chewing teenage girl, who’s boyfriend was DJ-ing in the back, and told her that maybe this music was inappropriate for a shop that had children in it.

Without batting a fake eyelash she told me that she thought that the music was perfectly appropriate.  So I listened for a couple of seconds and said to her, “I’m going to lick your pussy until you scream.” As you might expect, she was appalled and said, “What?!”

I explained to her that I was just repeating the last line of the “appropriate” lyrics that had at that moment been played over the store’s loudspeakers.  She scurried off and put on some Muzak.  Score one for me.

The best part of this story is that I told it to a friend of mine in America.  That weekend he was in church and before the service started he snickered to himself, remembering what I had said.  His sister-in-law (also an old family friend) asked him what was so funny and he leaned in and told her.  As he came to the line, “I’m going to lick your pussy until you scream,” of course the organ stopped and the church was completely quiet.  The occupants of the two pews in front of them looked around horrified.

Score several more for me.




4 Responses to “Young People’s Music These Days”

  1. Mark Says:

    A strike for decency, using the enemy’s weapons against them. Kudos to you, sir.

  2. +Eddie Says:

    I almost wet myself laughing when I read this. You score again!!!

  3. Tim Says:

    John I am surprised you didn;t name Dan SxxxxxT name as the man in the church

  4. Grizzly Smith Says:

    It is nice, from time to time, to say “LOL!” and mean it. Like now, for example.

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